The Worst Advice a Mediumship Mentor Ever Gave Me

When I developing my psychic abilities and mediumship, I sat in TONS of spiritual development circles and got to work with some amazing mentors.

My mentors were encouraging, and nudged me to stand on my own two feet as a medium and intuitive reader.

OK, they sort of pushed me out of the nest because I was superbly non-confident and shaking in my sandals every time I had to give a reading.

But there is one piece of advice that tripped me up for years!  

I was sitting in mediumship class one day with about five other people. We were taking turns linking in with Spirit and giving each other messages.

One of my friends was giving me a message and started to cry.

And as soon as she did, our mentor said, “No, no, no… the medium never cries!”

She said it in such a way that it made us all sit straight up in our seats.  I remember getting really nervous and hoping I wouldn’t cry when it was my turn!

She continued to explain, “It is your job to pass on the message.  Doctors don’t cry, lawyers don’t cry, and neither do mediums.”

Case closed.  End of story.  That’s all she wrote.

At that point, I wrote a note to myself:

No crying in readings!  Period. Ever!  Even if you hear the most heartwarming or heartbreaking tale of your life, suck it up, buttercup and don’t cry.

I cried when my son was three and his “best friend” wouldn’t talk to him, so this was going to be a challenge!

Holding Back the Tears

Cue Simply Red, Holding Back the Years song here…

Alrighty, so for the next several years, I never shed one tear during a reading, not even when I worked with grieving parents.  Not even when I worked with the mom who lost BOTH of her daughters.

Not. One. Tear. Ever.

Don’t get me wrong, I wasn’t an Ice Queen.

I cared deeply and sincerely about these people. I would hug them and hold their hands. I welcomed them into my home for our sessions. I made them tea.

I WANTED to comfort them – that was the reason I was working as an intuitive and medium.

To me, the work was sacred.  And the people that came to me were brave souls who were allowing themselves to be vulnerable.

But my mentor’s advice was always in the back of my mind – the medium never cries – and I found a way to disconnect my emotions from my readings.

And for many years, something felt “off.”

The Day it All Changed

It was around 2010 or so when I learned about the Akashic Records and had my first Akashic reading.  The reading was like none I had ever had before.

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It was so loving, so authentic and… so emotional.

Wait… whaaaat?

Many times during the reading, Christina (the reader) expressed to me how she was getting “choked up” because she could feel some of the things I had been through.

She wasn’t crying buckets or anything, but she allowed herself to be totally immersed in the  process – and I felt like she connected with my soul.

HOLY GUACAMOLE!

This was a life changing reading for me for two reasons:

• I was immediately called to the Akashic Records and began studying and learning about the Akasha
• I began allowing myself to open my heart and soul into the readings I was giving.  If emotion came, it came.

The Flood Gates Open – Grab the Tissues

I remember the first time I allowed myself to be vulnerable during a reading.

I was sitting in my living room, giving a mediumship reading to a mom who had lost her only son.  Understandably, she was extremely emotional.

As I continued to make a connection with her son, she cried.  I cried.

There was such a connection – between me, this amazing woman, and her beautiful son in Spirit.

The reading was full of love, and also laughter – her son made her laugh all the time while he was here on the earth plane and his sense of humor was shining through!

When the session was over, I was a little tired, but I felt wonderful, complete, and whole!

Now I’m not telling you to go and bawl your eyes out with your clients.  I agree, that wouldn’t be very professional.

And to be perfectly honest with you – giving intuitive readings in this manner isn’t for everyone.  Many people do prefer to disconnect emotionally from their clients.

Some readers are so empathic that it’s hard for them to turn off their feelings. Yet others may find that allowing their heart to open distracts their link with the Spirit world.

But I’ve learned, I just can’t work that way.  When I feel my clients’ struggles, I cry.

When I feel they are rocking at life, I want to give them a high-five and throw confetti.

Spiritual work is soul work – and the soul feels.

When you are giving intuitive readings, don’t filter yourself.  Connect on a soul level.

If you feel emotion , it’s OK.  It’s a soul connection and a human connection.

Don’t be a stone. Let your walls down.  Be real.  Connect.