Empathic folks have it tough. I know, I’m one of them. And I know some empaths (a.k.a. clairsentients) feel drained because of the energy they feel from others.
Friend, that stinks, and we need to fix it.
What is an empath?
Empaths can feel energy — including the energy of others. It’s also known as clairsentience, which means psychic sensing or feeling.
If you’re an empath, you may feel like:
- OMG, the drama at work is soooo draining
- Going to large events is exhausting
- Birthday parties can make you want to sleep for a week
These feelings can be rough for empaths who haven’t learned to manage their gifts yet.
Related: 15 Signs You’re an Empath (not just “too sensitive”)
It’s like you want to climb on a raft with your journal and paddle to a deserted island… where there are no people, no news, and no drama! (I would also bring a photo of Bradley Cooper when he had his sexy Hangover hair.)
But have no fear!
Over the last 20 years I’ve developed my own personal empathic guide. These are the skills that help me manage my psychic feelings and calm clairsentient anxiety… because I don’t think the raft and Bradley Cooper thing are gonna happen.
So now, let me share my tips with you. Go ahead and try different ones or combine them to create your own empath blend!
Empathic Survival Tips
1. Be aware of your perspective
My number one empathic survival skill of all time:
Be mindful of your perspective.
When you are aware of your perspective, it can feel like 100 bricks are lifted off your chest. You see, empaths want to save everyone from their pain. But you can’t save everyone.
A simple concept? Yes. Easy to put into practice? With a fresh perspective, yes!
How to be mindful of your perspective:
Next time you start going down the emotional rabbit hole (like when you feel someone’s sorrow and want to cry through a box of tissues)… remind yourself that we are all spiritual beings here to learn and grow.
- Perhaps this is part of their soul’s plan, and something they wanted to learn from.
- Or maybe something wonderful is around the corner, but they have to go through this to see it.
Did you ever see the movie The Pursuit of Happyness?
Well, one afternoon, a box of Kleenex and I watched this inspiring movie based on the life of Chris Gardner. You see, Chris fell on hard times, and he and his son ended up homeless. My heart hurt watching this movie.
But Chris didn’t give up. His struggles motivated him, and in the end, he became a Wall Street legend!
The point is: we never know. Each soul is on its own path.
And let me be clear, I’m NOT saying not to help others or care. Things like volunteering and bringing soup to a sick friend are all loving things to do…
BUT, before you let someone else’s pain envelop you — breathe. Imagine sending them love and light. Then, trust that there is a Divine plan and their Spirit Guides will support them.
2. Dealing with energy vampires when you’re empathic
Obvi, we can’t avoid being around draining people sometimes (a.k.a. energy vampires). If only, right!
You may work with one (or 10) energy vampires or have one in your family.
So what do we do when we can’t get on a boat and escape?
First, when you know you are going to interact with someone who drains you, prepare yourself. How? By surrounding yourself with white light, of course!
Khaleesi has her dragons and we have white light. White light is your psychic armor.
That’s because the negative emotions of others can’t penetrate your psychic shield. Score! (BTW, here are more psychic protection techniques and empath tips.)
You can do this on the fly, too.
For example, if you’re with a negative person, surround yourself with white light. This will protect you from energy drain.
You can do this anywhere, anytime, so you never have to go unprotected. In fact, you should surround yourself with white light every morning — or introduce clove oil to your routine.
Use Pink Light, Too
You can also imagine surrounding yourself or others with pink light.
Then, set the intention to heal your (or their) pain, whether it’s physical or emotional.
I like to do this when I’m driving and come across a motor accident.
I also send pink light whenever a friend or family member is suffering. I imagine sending them oodles of loving vibes, and surrounding them in soft pink light.
This allows me to help without causing me to feel drained.
3. Remember the law of attraction is at work
Now, you might think this is a strange thing to bring up in an empathic post, but stick with me.
My grandmother is constantly having her appliances break down. It’s almost comical, because you know when you talk to her you are going to hear about the fridge or microwave dying.
The thing is, my grandma firmly believes that “it’s always something.”
She believes that, when one thing gets fixed, something else will break. And the universe delivers. Every. Single. Time.
So why am I telling you this? Because the law of attraction is real and we all attract things we may not be aware of.
For example, do you know someone who always ends up with the same type of manipulative partner? And when they break up, you want to help them — even though this is the millionth time it’s happened?
Well, this pattern is repeating itself for a reason. And they likely won’t find happiness until they recognize it for themselves.
The point is: you may want to help, but that doesn’t mean you can. After all, we are all conscious creators.
So make this your empathic mantra:
Sometimes, people have to work things out for themselves to grow spiritually.
4. Avoid negativity and psychic vampires if you’re empathic
We all know at least one person who loves to complain no matter what kind of good stuff is happening around them. You know, like Debbie Downer from Saturday Night Live?
You don’t need an empathic guide to tell you that being around them is exhausting.
So remember this:
When you are drained, you aren’t at your best. And that means you can’t help those who genuinely need help.
- You can’t give your clients your best intuitive readings
- And you have nothing left for your spouse, children or yourself
So try to surround yourself with like-minded people. Remember that like attracts like.
As a clairsentient, it’s also important to keep your vibration up by doing things that make you happy.
For me, I love the adult coloring craze! So let the dishes go and do something that makes YOU happy.
Empathic Tip! I have a family member whose an eternal pessimist. When I chat with her and start feeling drained, I say something positive to raise my vibration. Try it, it works great!
5. Avoid negativity on TV
The media loves to play up the awful stuff going on in the world. Sure, that sells newspapers and cable subscriptions, but it’s not good for empaths.
In fact, as an empath, you should be careful about what you expose yourself to. And, you may even want to limit time on social media (which we know can be draining!)
Sure, keeping up with current events is important. I get that. But for me, it’s not worth the crappy way I feel when I consume a constant stream of war, famine, political rhetoric or violence.
I watch, read and listen to uplifting or funny TV, movies, books and podcasts. And I hide or unfriend anyone on social media that spreads drama.
This may sound harsh, but I’ve learned this is what I have to do for my own well-being.
As an empathic person, it’s important that YOU feel good! When you do, you can embrace your intuitive gifts and do positive things in the world!
Bonus Tips for Empaths
As I said earlier, being an empath is part of the psychic gift of clairsentience. This beautiful gift means you get intuitive senses about things… like you can feel the positive vibes in your sister’s new home.
And one great way to manage your empathic gift is to develop clairsentience. This will help you manage your ability and recognize when you are having a clairsentient experience. For example, you could:
- Give psychometry a try (reading the energy of objects)
- Practice clairsentient exercises and even blend them into your day!
- Read this Clairsentient Cheat Sheet that’s loaded with tips and exercises
Empath Guide Takeaways
As an empathic person, you aren’t doing yourself (or others) any good by giving until you have nothing left.
You are on this earth to live your best intuitive life with your psychic gifts. And you are here to spread loving vibes into the world. To do that, practice the empathic survival skills you just learned.
For more helpful tips, download my free audio and guide, 7 Real World Steps to Embracing Your Intuitive Gifts.